Monday, August 31, 2009


Tonight I am feeling very sophisticated. Instead of slumming it on network television, I have opted to watch my old favorite "Antiques Roadshow." I have to say that I don't feel nearly as dirty watching experts appraise Charles Dickens' handwritten letters as I do watching 20-somethings get drunk and throw their bodies around like trash on "The Bachelorette." (Don't let my bravado fool you, I have never missed a season of "The Bachelor" or "The Bachelorette," for that matter, did you hear Aaron Buerge just got married?)

And in keeping with my newfound mental elevation, I am resolving to put down my beach trash, and begin to read Jane Austen. Pride and Prejudice to be specific. Because I have never read it. There, I admit it: I have never read a Jane Austen novel in my life. Do you think I will be smarter when I finish it? I don't know. Perhaps my writing will reflect my newfound literacy? I don't know. I will endeavor to inform you in a fortnight.

This brings me to my third and final resolution for the week: I am going to try to update this blog more frequently rather than waiting for any sort of intellectual stimulation over on Facebook. Perhaps it is because I am a latecomer to the Facebook party or perhaps it is because I have no interest in seeking out all of my failed friendships and adding them to my "friends list" - but I am seriously tired of trying to decipher cryptic messages like "You know what I'm sayin....... ;)" from people I hardly know. I have used more emoticons in my experience on Facebook than I would care to admit and my sprawling vocabulary (joke) has been reduced to "LMAO" or "WTF?" Yes folks, I actually responded to post the other day by writing "WTF". Which is worse? Having never read Jane Austen or frequent and sundry use of abbreviations and emoticons? IDK. I will spend the rest of this week trying to rectify both wrongs.

(or is it that I have never missed a "Bachelor" season. Sorry. That one I won't change.)

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