Monday, August 31, 2009

Elevation

Tonight I am feeling very sophisticated. Instead of slumming it on network television, I have opted to watch my old favorite "Antiques Roadshow." I have to say that I don't feel nearly as dirty watching experts appraise Charles Dickens' handwritten letters as I do watching 20-somethings get drunk and throw their bodies around like trash on "The Bachelorette." (Don't let my bravado fool you, I have never missed a season of "The Bachelor" or "The Bachelorette," for that matter, did you hear Aaron Buerge just got married?)

And in keeping with my newfound mental elevation, I am resolving to put down my beach trash, and begin to read Jane Austen. Pride and Prejudice to be specific. Because I have never read it. There, I admit it: I have never read a Jane Austen novel in my life. Do you think I will be smarter when I finish it? I don't know. Perhaps my writing will reflect my newfound literacy? I don't know. I will endeavor to inform you in a fortnight.

This brings me to my third and final resolution for the week: I am going to try to update this blog more frequently rather than waiting for any sort of intellectual stimulation over on Facebook. Perhaps it is because I am a latecomer to the Facebook party or perhaps it is because I have no interest in seeking out all of my failed friendships and adding them to my "friends list" - but I am seriously tired of trying to decipher cryptic messages like "You know what I'm sayin....... ;)" from people I hardly know. I have used more emoticons in my experience on Facebook than I would care to admit and my sprawling vocabulary (joke) has been reduced to "LMAO" or "WTF?" Yes folks, I actually responded to post the other day by writing "WTF". Which is worse? Having never read Jane Austen or frequent and sundry use of abbreviations and emoticons? IDK. I will spend the rest of this week trying to rectify both wrongs.

(or is it that I have never missed a "Bachelor" season. Sorry. That one I won't change.)

Just Thinkin...

I am lying here waiting to fall asleep. Upon waking tomorrow morning I will be catapulted back into the drudgery of school. It is no wonder that sleep doesn't come easily tonight. My life will change drastically tomorrow and I am ill prepared for it's onset.

Really, aside from the physical strains of dragging children out of bed, to the breakfast table, to school on time, to friends houses to play, home to do homework - my ill preparedness comes from a melancholy attached to knowing that I will spend the majority of my day away from the people who bring me the most joy: my precious family. And like any anxiety induced insomnia, thought begets thought.

My dad has always asserted that time is a "manmade construct." I wholeheartedly disagree. But perhaps it exists not like we imagine with our western minds - but more like the Native Americans asserted. As if we are staring down a well and all "time" is existing at once. Wouldn't it make sense that even in my most happy of times I am pinched with a strange melancholy, an urge to weep for the beauty of it all? Wouldn't it make sense, that somewhere out there, an aged me is looking back on now and wishing that she could have it all back? Does her sadness touch me here? Does my joy and peace now bring her any solace?

These are the times that I will cherish for the rest of my life: the late mornings in pajamas, sun-soaked children sleeping under fans for the summer heat, fresh fruit for breakfast, silly songs, walks to the playground, drying tears for skinned knees. These are the moments I will miss while my children are away.

These are the moments I will wish for when I am a little old lady.

Friday, August 7, 2009

Life's A Beach


Do you know how much I love the beach? Well, a lot. And lucky us, we're still here.
I have a lot more photos to post and a lot more to write. I have derived a lot of inspiration from this little trip of ours. Mostly I am just thankful for the moments I have gotten to spend, uninterrupted, with my glorious husband and precious children. And tonight, as they all sleep and I peruse the many, many pictures that we have taken - I cannot help but well up with gratitude for the many fortunes that we have been afforded in this life.
More to come,,,, many many more to come!
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